


i know you in the dark like i know my own self

by jaqhad (kyrilu)



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, Star Wars: Poe Dameron (Comics)
Genre: Guilt, M/M, MayThe4th Treat, Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-05-04
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:35:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23580958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyrilu/pseuds/jaqhad
Summary: After Crait, Poe runs into Terex on Nar Shaddaa.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Terex
Comments: 6
Kudos: 8
Collections: May the 4th Be With You Star Wars Fanworks Exchange 2020





	i know you in the dark like i know my own self

**Author's Note:**

  * For [merle_p](https://archiveofourown.org/users/merle_p/gifts).



> Or: the one where Poe wants Terex to fuck the guilt out of him, post-TLJ! 
> 
> Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to write this ship -- May the Fourth be with you!

The great thing about being a crime lord is that it’s so easy to be forgiven. Unlike the Empire or the First Order, there are no deadly demerit systems or overbearing officers, and it’s a neat matter of calling in the right favors and having the right leverage. 

Thus, Terex waltzes back into the criminal underworld like he had never left. He builds himself a decent operation to the point that he can drink koja rum without looking over his shoulder. 

A year on out, he runs into Poe Dameron on Nar Shaddaa. He’s stopping by Hutta Town for a spot of business, and as he enters Grakkus’ palace, he sees the back of a familiar head, trademark lovely dark curls and practically emanating righteousness. 

“Grakkus,” Poe is saying, impatiently, “you owe us. All I’m asking is for a ship to borrow, fueled and ready to go, no questions asked.” 

The Hutt says, his voice a rumble: “As I recall, I owe you and your Resistance nothing. You broke me out of Megalox -- I provided the information about Lor San Tekka that you desired -- and our transaction was concluded.”

“Pal, I’m offering you some credits, too. I promise to have it back in a week or two at the most.” 

Grakkus lets out a chuckle. “A mere pittance. I doubt you’re taking the ship on a jaunt to Spira. I might as well shoot it into the heart of a sun.”

Poe opens his mouth to argue. Terex sighs, and he jostles his way past Grakkus’ bodyguards.

“I’ll cover it for him,” Terex says. “I’ll owe double the next time around.” 

Grakkus throws open his fleshy green arms, his wide mouth contorting into a grin. “Terex! Good to see you again, my friend. You acquired the item?”

“I did.” Terex presents the package he’s carrying with a flourish. “Easier than I hoped, in fact. I expect the usual shipments to Kaddak -- though, of course, put his ship on my tab.” 

“... That is acceptable. I never thought I’d see you, of all people, working with the Resistance.” 

Terex scoffs. “Hardly. I have unfinished business with Dameron and don’t want to wait until he’s done with negotiations.” 

Poe is looking at him with narrowed suspicious eyes. 

“So, Poe,” Terex says, throwing his arm around Poe’s shoulders, “want a drink?” 

* * *

To be blunt, Poe Dameron looks like bantha shit. He’s rather ragged, circles underneath his eyes, his flightsuit wrinkled, stubble a mite thicker than Terex had been used to seeing. Still, he glares at Terex as he follows him into a nearby bar. 

“Is the noble Resistance so desperate as to beg for resources from criminals?” Terex asks.

“Don’t play dumb,” Poe says, running his fingers through his hair. “I’m sure with your network, you’ve heard what happened to our fleet. What do you want, Terex? ‘Cause you’re not the type to give out ships without strings attached. Unless you just want to gloat, in which case, you’re wasting my time.” 

“Hmm,” Terex hums. “What’s wrong with a drink between old friends?” 

“Sure. Friends.” 

The bartender sets down the drinks Terex had ordered: Tevraki whiskey and sunfruit liquor. Terex slides the latter over to Poe, who eyes it dubiously. 

“It’s not poisoned,” Terex says. He wouldn’t dispatch an old enemy like Poe in such a boring fashion.

“--I know,” Poe says. 

“It’s sweet. You like sweet drinks, don’t you?” 

“How the hell do you know that?” Poe pauses. Terex, very pointedly, does not reply. “Never mind, I don’t think I want to know.” He takes a sip.

“It was bad, wasn’t it? An informant just commed me a minute ago,” Terex gestures to his comlink, “and told me you arrived here on a Corellian light freighter. Don’t tell me you lost your beloved Black One.” 

Poe draws in a sharp breath. “It was your old First Order friends that did it, Terex.”

“Ah, not my friends any longer,” Terex says, wagging a finger. “I’m sure your daredevil antics had something to do with it. Poe Dameron, the brave hero who jumps into action! Except, oops, look at all this mess around him.” He leans forward, and he smiles as Poe’s eyes darken. 

“Don’t lecture me,” Poe snaps. “You have no idea how much we lost, how much I--” 

“What? The depths of your sadness? The strength of your determination to seek justice, avenge lost friends, etcetera?”

“I’m gonna make things right,” Poe says. “And you _are_ just wasting my time.” 

Terex shakes his head. “I think that you followed me into this bar too easily, too quickly, and you’re hoping to get drunk enough to use that as an excuse to tell yourself later. I won’t allow you that excuse, Poe. You asked me about the strings attached -- but you already know.” 

He reaches out, and he touches Poe’s chin with his thumb. “Come on. Don’t let down your friends, your Resistance. Come with me to my ship.”

Poe blinks. His voice is hoarse when he says, “Okay -- okay.” 

* * *

“I see you’ve stopped with the slave labor,” Poe says, surveying Terex’s ship. It’s no _Carrion Spike_ , but a capable enough gunship. He hadn’t bothered to get himself a…crew... and decided to stick with service droids this time around. 

“Are you volunteering?” 

Poe lets out a low growl and pushes Terex against the durasteel wall. “You held my friend’s wife captive, Terex. You forced Oddy to turn spy, and he’s dead now. And even though you’re not with the First Order anymore, you don’t regret it--you don’t regret any of it--and you’d do it again. You’re a trash compactor of a human being. You don’t have a single moral bone in your body.” 

And Terex laughs. “But you’ve done worse, haven’t you? Or at least, you think you have. That’s why you’re here.”

Carefully, he disentangles himself from Poe’s grasp. He steps away, pushes Poe against the wall, and Poe lets him, lets him, his hand pressing against Poe’s chest. He can feel Poe’s heart beating under his palm like a chronometer.

There is a flush on Poe’s cheeks, his mouth half-parted, his breath quickening -- this ragged, ragged wreck of a rebel, looking at Terex like he’s about to fall off a precipice. 

“My god,” Terex murmurs, cupping Poe’s jaw with his hand. “You want me to hurt you, and you think you deserve it. What happened to you, my dear commander? What _did_ you do?”

Poe’s jaw shifts underneath his hand. “I--I made a mistake. Several mistakes. A lot of them, honestly. We lost badly. Just get this over with, Terex.” 

“Tell me.” 

“I wouldn’t even know where to start,” Poe says, with a huff of a laugh. “I wasn’t a good soldier. Led a mutiny, for one.” 

Terex tilts his head. He remembers those damned implants attached to his skull. Malarus playing him like a valachord. The First Order had thought that he was too extreme, too disobedient. They believed they could control him, but they couldn’t. They couldn’t.

He knows what it feels like to be a caged hroth-beast yearning for the sky.

Terex reaches for Poe’s waist and touches him, a stroke of his palm over the clothed, burgeoning erection. Poe exhales a strangled gasp, his cock twitching, warm. He’s so eager, the way his hips jerk and ache for friction, and Poe tells him, “Please-- _c’mon_ \--hurry up--I want--” And he’s straining-- hoping, waiting, needing Terex to keep going faster, _harder._

“Oh, Poe,” Terex says, tut-tutting. “You very much want me to be rough, don’t you? The evil bastard who holds you down and takes whatever he wants. Your little piece of penance -- punishment. I am not going to give you what you want, Poe.” 

He pulls back his hand. Slowly, he kisses Poe, gentle and crushing. Poe tastes unbearably sweet, the savor of sunfruit liqueur, and Terex silently congratulates himself on the choice. It does feel nice to burrow his fingers in Poe’s thick soft hair, rubbing slow circles as he kisses and kisses.

Well -- that had been a lie. He's going to take whatever he wants. But he's going to be tender and considerate about it, and he'll do his utmost to memorize the feeling of Poe Dameron shuddering and desperate underneath him.

* * *

On the bed in Terex’s quarters, Poe falls asleep, spent, exhausted. He’s delightfully rumpled now, his hair mussed and his lips kiss-bitten. Idly, Terex touches the ring hanging around Poe’s neck on a chain. A token from a rebel paramour, perhaps? 

Poe opens his eyes, blinking rapidly. He says, “Let go of that.” Despite his easy surrender earlier, there’s a harsh edge to his tone. 

Terex puts his hands up in acquiescence. “Very well.”

Poe sits up and grabs his discarded flightsuit. Well, all good things must come to an end.

“The starfighter that Grakkus is loaning out to you is docked in hangar bay 11,” Terex says, as Poe dresses. “Not an X-wing, but it’ll serve your purposes.”

“I’d say thank you,” Poe says, “but I don’t think this is the best circumstance for---niceties.” 

“Oh, you were a nice enough lay,” Terex says, leering. 

“Let’s not do this again.” 

“Keep telling yourself that, Poe.” 

Poe doesn’t deign to respond, and Terex is content to watch his retreating back. Stars, Terex’s arch-nemesis is a foolish man. By nature, Poe is reckless and stubborn and wild, and he hates himself for those very traits. The self-loathing in Poe’s dark eyes is quite a sight to behold.

 _Go back to saving the galaxy like the hero you pretend you are_ , Terex thinks, contemptuous. _But unlike your friends, I know how you look like, wanton and wanting, on your knees._


End file.
